reason for desire of departure?

i just showed the ics worker my toe when we had our ics session. he said that i should wrap it and keep it elevated- which i told him my cousin joe told me to do also. then we checked my champs status. i didn't know i've been registered since 2022- so HOPEFULLY that increases my chances in getting housing sooner. i think it has me registered for 11 housing programs. i was thinking about when i decided i wanted to move to new york.. it must've been around the time i was 15. so that's NEARLY TWENTY FIVE YEARS. oh.. but i suppose YOU'D KNOW THAT IF you care about me enough to think you can make ANY influence on where i live in my life. i've always had the desire to move OUT of state. NOTHING and NO ONE has tempted me to remain in a place that hasn't ever really offered me any opportunities to be truly satisfied and/or successful. i've never felt anything appealing about living in this state. the racist crimes aren't fuckin helping anything either. maybe it'd help if certain people wouldn't have ignorantly voted for the racist piece of shit in the white house right now. you're just making shit more difficult for yourself not helping me the way I want to be helped. IF YOU HAD ANY FUCKING RESPECT AND CARE- YOU'D REALIZE THAT. you'd also realize i'm NOT the kind of person to just do what other people are doing just because that keeps the peace. never have and NEVER will. i realize that if i do that shit- it's gonna eventually take a toll on me.. either my body and/or mental health. THAT'S OKAY TO AMANDA THOUGH! NOBODY LISTENS TO STACY ANYWAY! AT LEAST SHE'LL BE GONE SO SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO BOTHER ME ANYMORE! RIGHT?! that's the impression i get from this lousy excuse of "support" i receive from my family. THEN YOU DICKS CAN GET ALL THE FUCKIN SYMPATHY YOU WANT WHEN I DIE! RIGHT MOM?! YOU'LL GET ALL THE DAMN ATTENTION YOU WANT FOR A DAUGHTER YOU ONLY PAID ATTENTION TO FOR YOUR OWN BENEFIT AND CONVENIENCE.. OH AND I FORGOT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO YOU- THE ATTENTION YOU'LL RECEIVE FOR SUPPOSEDLY "CARING" ABOUT ME! (when i know DAMN WELL the ONLY reason you ever took care of me when i was wheelchair bound was because my grandma threatened you every time you wouldn't- i remember hearing her do it). I KNOW I'M USELESS TO YOU SINCE I DON'T SERVE AS A SHIELD TO YOU WHEN DAD IS KICKIN YOUR ASS. so take your fake ass along with every other family member who just feels like they can care about me at their own convenience and STICK IT. i don't have time for you or amanda. you're just weights on my progression in life. selfish dicks.